Wednesday, August 22, 2007

If only Einstein had had a few drinking buddies...

Moments of Genuis. We all have them. Pure, beautiful bursts of thought so much more revolutionary than the usual stuff swimming through our minds. You can’t force ‘em, no matter how many energy drinks you pound. And oftentimes, they humbly mosey on down the road without us even realizing the genius-ness of it all.

(As I type that, I’m seriously doubting whether genius-ness is a word. Actually, I’m sure it’s not. But since reading exercises your brain, I’m leaving it --- consider it an extra brain push-up, courtesy of this blog.)

Anyhow, back to moments of genius you miss, only to realize later the genius of it all. With me, those moments often happen when I’m drinking. Inevitably, something pops out of my mouth that is stinkin’ MONEY in the “that-was-totally-genius” category, but I’d have forgotten all about it by the time I took another sip of my jack & coke. So, it’s usually only thanks to my friends reminding me later of those money-quotes that I ever remember them.

Take one of my favorites. My girl friend and I were at a bar, and this retard was hitting on us. Considering if we scared him off, another retard would likely approach, we just toyed with him a while. We told him she was a lesbian movie director’s personal assistant, and I was a private detective. We also told him we were lesbians on Tuesdays and Thursdays only. (This was on a Monday night.) Anyhow, I’m not sure if he believed us or not --- it was a total crock of shit, but we were pretty damn convincing. (Did I mention he was also not so bright?) Anyhow, one of our all-time favorite quotes happened just as we were about to leave. My friend paid her tab and came back to grab me. In the middle of retard boy’s “you guys aren’t leaving yet are you,” I abruptly looked at my watch and exclaimed, “Oh look, it’s 1-51. Not like Bacardi 151, but like an hour and 51 minutes past the time I should be getting laid.”

It was beautiful. Without another word, we were off, headed for our alleged Tuesday lesbian lovin’. I mean…damn! What an exit line! And I never would have even remembered it, had my friend not reminded me of it the next day. Ah, it still makes me laugh…

Ok, I know there are haters out there who may argue the genius-ness of that statement, funny as it was at the time. It was just an example, people. Don’t hate. (Look, another brain push-up. Have an extra Cheeto on me.) My point is, there are times in regular ol’ life where we say and do amazing things. And the irony of it all is, we hardly recognize it at the time. So, if you keep a journal, go back to the beginning of it and read it. I guarantee that you’ll find pearls of wisdom you completely missed in the midst of your initial venting. Or, remember that old friend or lover with whom you wrote all those firey emails back and forth with years ago? Log into your email and read some. Even if it’s something as simple as getting together with friends and rehashing last weekend’s drunken outbursts…I promise you, dear reader…you just may stumble upon your own moment of genius. ;)

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